I Am Mighty UMNO, Invincible and Immortal! (The UMNO Mind)

My name is UMNO. And this is my message to all you People of Malaysia who think I can be defeated by you.
- Mr. Smith

Remember everyone shudders at the mere mention of my name - the Police, MACC, the Election Commission, the AG chambers, the Judiciary, the newspaper editors and even the Rulers.

I order them and they obey me. Now, how is that you people of Malaysia are so stubborn and refuse to respect me and allow me to rule this country as I please.

You think I am bothered by all your police reports against me? You think the police will investigate me? You think all your reports on my corrupt practices bother me? You think the MACC will have the guts to investigate me?

You think you can bring me to court? Which court will rule against me? You stupid people! I am the Law. I am above the Constitution. Don't you forget that.

Oh! the Rulers? When I feel like it I criticize them. When I am in need of them I cry 'Daulat Tuanku' night and day. You see, I can do different things in different situations and my stupid children,the Mat Rempits, will come out in full force with yellow ribbons tight around their heads and shout 'Daulat Tuanku'. All they need is a few ringgit and they will echo whatever I say.

These school dropouts are my obedient children. It's only you educated, internet savvy people who give me trouble.

You see, stupid People of Malaysia, when I want the Malays to unite behind me, my children will wave the Jagur Gemilang and scream 'Hidup Malaysia'. If I am threatened by you further I will get them to wave the UMNO flag, wield the keris and cry 'Hidup Melayu' and call you 'Derhaka, Derhaka'.

So you see, I can use the yellow ribbon, the Jalur Gemilang, the UMNO flag and the keris to frighten my children into believing that they will have no future in this country if I am defeated.

Oh, you want to defeat me through elections? Ha! I have postal votes, phantom voters, and damn it, even if I lose I have the money to buy the victors. I can frighten them will bullets, nude pictures, sodomy/khalwat allegations and even kidnap them and their families if they refuse my offers.

If they are still stubborn I will make them disappear or take them in under the ISA. With the police at my beck and call, how can you ever win me, you stupid people.

HOW CAN YOU DEFEAT ME!!!!. EVEN GOD CANNOT DEFEAT ME!!!!!!!!!I AM IMMORTAL AND I WILL RULE THIS COUNTRY TILL JUDGEMENT DAY.

GOT IT?